Haphazard views : A snooping psyche dissected

It is not an unknown fact any more that Bangalore Traffic Police Department actually consists of hundred per cent pure, trained and seasoned robbers who have been given the 'license to rob' (their uniform) common people driving / riding on the roads - no matter whether they have violated any traffic rule or not.

Whenever these uniformed bastards need some extra money they would take off their badges and put them in the pockets so that the 'target' is not able to see their names and lodge a complain later.

In the past 2 years I have been stopped on the road by these bastards for no apparent reason at least 10 times, the most recent instance being that on last sunday at around 12:40 PM on Nandi Durga Road near J.C.Nagar Police Station.
I was coming back home with my wife from Cox Town market (that is the place where you get the best fish and prawns in Bangalore). Just before J.C.Road Police Station and Fun World, a Traffic Police constable (wearing khaki uniform and no badge) and an inspector (wearing white shirt, khaki trousers, riding on a white pulsar and wearing no badge) stopped us for no reason at all. Before stopping the vehicle I had put the ignition off and put the keys in my pockets. They asked for my DL and all the papers including RC Book, pollution certificate, insurance papers etc. Without a word I produced all. Then I took all papers back and politely asked why I was being checked without any reason. The constable said it was a routine random checking and nothing else. I was just about to start when he stretched his hand and signaled me to stop again and just said "300 Rupees". I asked why. Then the inspector intervened and said "pay and go or stay here stranded like this all day with your girlfriend".
I objected "excuse me, Sir, she is my wife and not my girlfriend". He wanted to see our wedding certificate as if we would be carrying it with us even to a fish market. Then he said again "you don't have your marriage certificate with you to prove that you are husband and wife so pay 300 rupees and leave". I simply refused and ignored him and started. For one last time he said "Wokkay Saar, pay 100 rupees at least, Saar". But I kept ignoring him and left the place.

These motherfuckers would first ask you to stop and show all your papers. If everything is in place they would check if you have consumed alcohol. If they don't find anything even then they would ask for money (would start from Rs 300 and eventually would come down to Rs 50). If you start arguing and ask for an explanation, they would suddenly forget Hindi/English and would talk in Kannada only.

To know the tips and tricks of saving yourselves from these results of illegitimate crosses between sluts and stray-dogs , namely Bangalore Traffic Police, please follow the instructions in my earlier blog "A pathetic city : BANGALORE".

Labels: Bangalore, serious, South India

Well, it was only after I ended up paying a huge amount of Income Tax in the last fiscal (2006-2007), I realized it was high time we, the tax-payers in India got a much clearer picture of what exactly our taxes are contributing to.

Some investigation on Google, as well as what I had known previously make me strongly believe that taxes, the increasingly gigantic portion of our hard-earned money get used in these ways. Please help me add to the list below.

True, there are areas for which we HAVE TO pay our due taxes as Indian citizens but there are things we pay for which in no way are our liabilities. Why should we be burdened with those taxes?

I have used bold fonts for the areas we SHOULD NOT BE CHARGED FOR at all. Why the heck should we pay for them?

DEFENCE (Army, navy and Air Force)
1. Training, Recruiting, Maintaining, Paying, Rewarding (in case of achievements) and Compensating (in case of demise or limb-loss)the defense personnel.

2. Buying and manufacturing machineries and weapons, aircrafts and helicopters, ships etc.

3. Maintaining a huge army-base at sensitive areas like LOC, Arunachal etc.

4. Security arrangements for Politicians. More controversial the politician, tighter the security.



SPORTS
1. Ministers visiting foreign countries to take inputs from them and improve the conditions of Infrastructure for sports in India. For example, Priya Ranjan Das Munshi visiting foreign countries to improve Indian Football. Especially whenever there is a World Cup or a Euro Cup, he will definitely be there with his team of legislators to collect 'valuable inputs' from European as well as Latin American Football federations.

2. Frequent foreign-tours by IOC (Indian Olympic Council) members to learn the mystery of doing well in the 'next olympic'. Results : No medal in 1984,1988,1992 ; one bronze medal each in 1996 and 2000; and one silver medal in 2004. Marked improvement, huh?


Education & Technology
1. In spite of the fact that India is doing quite fine in the Information Technology sectors, some 200 Karnataka legislators are planning to visit China to learn a thing or two of IT from them. The minimum estimated cost of their travel would be more than 5 crores. What the heck these politicians know of IT? How the hell are they supposed to understand anything? Not very long ago, the big boss of Indian IT, N.R.Narayanamurthy had publicly told that despite its rapid growth in IT sector, China still is lagging behind India in this field.

2. Grants and financial aid to Government schools and colleges but not . As long as the Indians in general are being benefitted from it, we don't have any issue paying for them but when everything in this country is quota-based, WHY CHARGE GENERAL CATEGORY PEOPLE FOR THE SO CALLED 'UPLIFTMENT' OF SC/ST/OBC-CATEGORY PEOPLE? It's the Government who wants the quota system, not the General-category people. Therefore, the Government only should pay for it, right?

OTHERS
1. Posh bungalows and sleek cars for ministers. WHY SHOULD WE PAY FOR THEM?

2. Five-star-hotel-like treatment of politicians and ministers everywhere, round-the-clock. WHY SHOULD WE PAY FOR THEM?

3. Changing the names of cities every now and then. Bombay to Mumbai, Madras to Chennai, Calcutta to kolkata, Bangalore to Bengaluroo and all cities-in-Karnataka to all-cities-in-Karnataka-luroo. This may sound simple but does come for a high price.
And who else but the tax-payers have to bear that?

4. Unnecessary moral policing. Censorship in movies, media, even internet. Are the Indians in general complaining? Are they demanding censorship? Why does the Government have to be so pro-active in doing these then?



I will keep adding to this list from time to time. I've just highlighted the liabilities we tax-payers could do without.
In my opinion (and I believe it's not 'only' my opinion), we the tax-payers should be given an option to choose where we want to see our hard-earned money go. The Government should let the non-highlighted ones remain compulsory but the tax-payers must have the right to choose which of the highlighted ones they want to pay for, if at all that is.

New points, suggestions and views are most welcome.

Labels: Bangalore, Fun, Miscellaneous, serious

Corruption is everywhere throughout the world but more so in Asia.
Corruption is everywhere throughout Asia but more so in India.
Corruption is everywhere throughout India but more so in the big cities.
Corruption is in every Indian city but more so in Bangalore.

The den of corruption? Bangalore it has to be !!!

After spending about five years at a stretch in India’s so-called Silicon Valley, I feel it’s high time I shared some information about our beloved city with my fellow countrymen coming from other places and also ones who are planning to land up here in near future.

Much has been talked and written about each of the issues I’m about to cover. Still, I’m trying to make a collective list of precautions one needs to take in this wonderful city.

BMTC Buses
Other than the route number, everything including the source and destination of the bus would be written in Kannada and in most cases the Driver/Conductor won’t understand a single word in Hindi/English. So it is advisable that any newcomer to Bangalore who has to travel in the BMTC buses learns to speak and read Kannada before boarding the buses.

Sometimes, the Conductor won’t have change in his pocket so he will give you a ticket for 3 rupees, write balance 7/- at its back and keep the 10 rupee note that you’ve given him in his pocket. In case you forget to ask for the change, especially when you are in a hurry, he will never give it back to you. And, if you ask for the change, he will give you the change, take the ticket back from you and re-issue the same ticket to some other passenger after you get down.

Sometimes, despite understanding Hindi/English they would ask you questions in Kannada and if you answer in Hindi/English, be ready for abuses/taunts from the conductor and even a few fellow passengers, especially so if you are wearing the tag of an IT-Company. You are just another outsider who has eaten up yet another local son’s job, after all. So you deserve such treatment.

Things are much better though, in the red Volvo buses, probably because the whole ticketing system is computerized and mostly educated and cultured people travel by those buses.

Auto rickshaws, Taxis and the Cops
The moment you land up at the Railway Station or Airport, the first person to welcome you to the city would be an auto-driver or a taxi-driver. He will show you a rate-chart for different destinations in the city. If you are new to Bangalore, chances are there that you’ll be screwed brutally. The rate-chart usually contains rates at least 2 times, some times even 3 times what the actual fare should be. So you better not take an auto/ a taxi from the Railway Station or the Airport unless, of course, you take it from the Government prepaid taxi/auto counters.

The khaki-clad dacoits (auto drivers) would have faulty meters installed in their vehicles which actually would run much faster. If you cover exactly the same distance twice in two different autos, you’ll be amazed to see the significant difference in meter-readings of the two.
On top of that, they would charge you one-and-a-half and double whenever they want to. If they realize that you badly need an auto, they would take undue advantage of your helplessness and charge exorbitant fares.
Sometimes, even after you have agreed to pay them what they have demanded, they would ask for more when you get down and if you don’t want to pay, verbal abuses will be thrown at you.


There is a complain-cell in the Police department for auto-drivers. You can call up these numbers and lodge a complain whenever an auto driver misbehaves charges extra or refuses to go.
Indiranagar – 080 25253726
Jayanagar – 080 26630989
Koramangala – 080 25533525
Rajajinagar – 080 23324388
Yashwanthpur – 080 23376039
Call the number of the nearest office to the place of incident.
However, by the time you have finished complaining, chances are there that the auto-driver would have fled. Then the Police would arrive and take you to the Police Station, ask you a few questions in Kannada and if you don’t answer in the same language, they would ask you to lodge a formal complain mentioning name, address, license details and several other information about the auto-driver most of which you wouldn’t know so the complain won’t be lodged and for wasting precious time of the dedicated policemen, you would be asked to pay some bribe. If you refuse to bribe them, they would forcibly make you speak in Kannada and take every single penny that you have with you. If you don’t have much money, they would keep your Driver’s License, PAN card, Mobile, Wrist Watch or any other valuable possession and would ask you to go to an ATM and withdraw money for them. If you still refuse, you might end up getting a few slaps/punches and some vocal tonic as well.

Although the Cops, auto-wallahs and bus-conductors may not speak Hindi/English at all, they always have a readily available large vocabulary of Hindi abuses (gaalis).

If you go to a Police Station to lodge a complaint or to report something, even if it is for something as meagre as a cell phone being stolen, they won't take your complaint unless you bribe them. Things become different to some extent if there is a woman with you becuse for some unknown reason the cops pretend to be very honest in front of women. So, whenever you are dealing with the Bangalore cops, try to take a lady with you.

Traffic Police: Special Mention
If you are driving, it doesn’t really matter whether you have committed a traffic violation or not, if the Bangalore traffic cops are in the mood of screwing you, they would do it anyway.
All they would do is they would stop you in the middle of the road and ask a question in Kannada. If you don’t answer in Kannada, only God can save you from becoming penniless at the point of time. Even your not committing a traffic violation as well as having all the papers with you can't save you.

Landlords
A simple non-furnished 2 bedroom flat in a not-so-good locality, situated between a stinking dumping ground and a slum would cost you a good 7000-8000 rupees per month.There would be some concessions if you are not an IT-professional because IT-Professionals are all millionaires, after all. Anyone can rob them. They are the reason why the local children are unemployed. They are the ones who flock into pubs and discs in the weekends, roam around with pretty girls hand in hand on M.G.Road and brigade Road, wear branded clothes and eat in posh joints. It is because of them that the Kannadigas' children are not getting their jobs. So no mercy should be shown to them.

Besides, you have to pay a sum of 10 times the monthly rent to the landlord before occupying the flat. When you decide to vacate the flat, he would deduct repairing and repainting charges; one month’s rent (in case you couldn’t give him a month’s notice before leaving) from it and give the remaining amount back.
Most of them (not all) usually invest your money in some business like real-estate or stocks so they won’t be able to give you your money back at once. Therefore, you have to come back to their places again and again asking for your own money. The best way to deal with these morons is putting a strong new lock on the apartment door and not handing over the keys to them until and unless you’ve got your money back.


RTO / Sub Registrars’ Office / Other Govt. Offices

1. If you are coming to Bangalore from some other part of India and you don’t have a Passport or a Driver’s License, please get these made before you come to Bangalore.
Fortunately enough, I had my Passport made before coming here but I have seen people going through hell to get their passports. Getting a Passport issued is not as much a problem as getting it in your hand from the Officials and cops is. There are two ways of getting your passport in your hand. One, bribe them. And two, bribe them.

Unfortunately, I didn’t have a Driver’s License when I had come to Bangalore. I needed to get one so following the standard set of procedures that are followed in all other states I approached the RTO and was told I needed to shell out 2000 rupees to get my DL issued. And, after the DL is issued, I would have to give something to the Inspector for his children so that I get it in my hand. A very close friend of mine had lost 2000 rupees but still didn’t get his DL following this set of procedures. He asked me to get it done through a Driving School. I went to get admitted to a reputed Driving School and they charged me an exorbitant amount (almost 4000 rupees) for 10 hours of driving classes, learner’s license and final Driver’s License. When I asked why they were charging me so much, they said, it was actually not that much because 1500-2000 rupees will go in bribing the RTO officials only.


2. I and my wife wanted to get our marriage registered. The solemnization was done before only. We had the certificate and all other legal documents ready. Our families, including our parents, were present. As always, we yet again were asked questions in Kannada which we couldn’t answer and therefore, we were asked to purchase a 5-rupee form for 350 rupees . We were also asked to come back after a month and were told we would get the certificate only after paying about 3000 rupees more.
This time I was so irritated and furious that I simply refused to pay the bribe.
Finally, with some friends’ advices, we approached a non-Kannadiga advocate who helped us get the marriage certificate. He took quite a hefty fee but we didn’t have to undergo the pain again.

Traffic : New Addition
If you are not aware of the traffic situations in Bangalore and you are planning to drive a car or ride a motorcycle here, there are a few things you must keep in mind.

---No matter how careful a driver you are, always remain extra-cautious on the road. 90% of the people driving (including auto-drivers, BMTC bus drivers, Company bus drivers, call-centre cab drivers and even some private car drivers) do not have any road-ethics. They just refuse to use brakes and indicators, forget hand-signals. Especially the auto-drivers, BMTC bus drivers and call-centre cab drivers drive as if the roads are owned by their dads. So please be extra-extra-extra-cautious on Bangalore roads.

---If a traffic cop asks you to stop even though you know you haven't done anything wrong, make it a point to take out the keys of your vehicle and put them in the pocket before the cop does the same because once he gets hold of the keys he just won't let you go without making you shell-out a large sum of money. Never ever let them have the keys. They keep robbing people like this, more so at festive times like Deepavali, Ugadi, Onam, Christmas, Eid , New Year etc when they need extra money for shopping.

---Never carry the originals of your DL, Vehicle insurance papers, RC Book etc because, if they don't get the keys they would keep these originals and unless and until you bribe them, you won't get them back. Just carry photocopies (preferably attested ones) of everything so that they just don't get anything to focefully extract bribe from you.

---Never ever try to jump a signal or drive into a no-entry even if you can't see any cops around. Firstly, these actually are traffic violations so you should never do these. Secondly, the cops know if people don't see them they would be tempted to do these and instead of stopping people from violating the traffic rules they just hide somewhere nearby and the moment someone breaks the rules, they suddenly emerge from nowhere and rob him. Therefore, even if you see red-light at an empty signal, never jump the signal. And, never drive into a no-entry however hurry you are in, however late it is in the night, however empty the street is.


These were my experiences in Bangalore. If anyone can add any other point(s), please do so. I am so fed up of this place that I desperately want to get out of it. But, unfortunately, because of some professional as well as personal obligations, I have no option but to stay here for some more time.

It is very easy for high-profile citizens, elite localites and celebrities to repeatedly say that there is no corruption in Bangalore and that it is a nice city.
Unless they come down to the grass-root level from their elevated postitions , outside their media-backed lifestyles, and try walking in an 'outsider's' shoes, they would never know what many people like me have to go through here.

From whatever I have seen, the general public (mainly consisting of middle and upper-middle class) of Bangalore seems to be like any other city's. They are nice, calm and co-operative but in our day-to-day lives we hardly come across people like them.
The major problem lies with uneducated, semi-educated and Government-employed people. Everyone has to deal with these kinds of people. There is no other option.

Five years back, like many, I too had a notion that Bangalore was a great city. When I came here, I had dreamt of so many nice things but all my dreams got shattered after staying here. Even if it was a great place before, it isn't anywhere near that status these days. If I somehow can manage to get out of this place, I would try my best not to come back here in my entire life.

Labels: Bangalore, Fun, Politics, serious, South India

Weird Weird South ...




Picture Courtesy ...


I have a friend whose name is Suchitra Pradhan.

She recently joined a new company in Bangalore.
On her first day in office she saw her name in the attendance register as Suchithra Pradhan. She at first thought it was just a typing error but when after two days she got her official email id as suchithra.pradhan@xxyyzz.com, she went to the HR(Hyeitch-aaar)people and complained. They denied making any mistake on their part and said it was Suchitra who had spelt her name wrong in the joining form and hence all this happened. Upon being asked to show her the form, they gave it to her. Looking at it she was horrified as she saw someone has added the extra 'h' in her name in the form itself with red ink, as if to do a spelling correction.
However, she showed this unique example of voluntary service to the HR people and was assured that it would be corrected immediately.
On the very next day, when Suchitra Pradhan went back to office, it was Suchitra Prabha N in the attendance register.
She ran again to the HR department and they once again assured her that it would be corrected. So it was. On the subsequent day it became Suchithra Prabha N.
Furious, she stormed into the HR-room and threw the attendance register on the table.
Finally her name appeared correctly in the attendance register after eight days.
I don't know if she has got a correct official email id yet.

Labels: Bangalore, Fun, Miscellaneous, serious, South India

Mugging, theft at knife-point, assault. All in the space of a month in the heart of town. What's happening to Bangalore?

Yes, this is going to be yet another post on our own Bangalore, and unfortunately, it's not going to be one to be going ga ga about.

This, coming across articles like this while going through any leading daily, is not a rare phenomenon any more.

A city that was famous for its public-safety-system and more famous for its outstanding night-life once upon a time has gradually turned into one where the inhabitants feel staying outside for whatsoever reason after 8:30-9:00 at night is not really worth taking the risk it may involve.
The crime rate in Bangalore till a couple of years back was very low. But it has started to rise alarmingly. At any place on earth (not only Bangalore or any other Indian city) crime usually originates from the grass-root level of the society , i.e , the lower and lower-middle classes and is the result of more need than greed due to social and financial insecurity. No exception here.

First only the Software Engineers, who were and still are believed to be coming from outside and taking away all the money and thus deprieving the children of the local lower and middle class, were the first victims of these people.
Then the range of targets got extended up to 'outsiders' working in any field, not only in IT and finally the motto of these people have become 'NOBODY WILL BE SPARED'.
What is worse is nowadays not only non-localites but also the localite Kannadigas are being targetted.
Policemen, if approached, usually advise the victims to be more alert and try to prove that these incidents are happening only because of the sheer callousness and carelessness of people (My first-hand experience when I went to lodge a complaint in a Police Station after my cell phone was snatched in the broad daylight : The officer-in-charge had told me the only reason of crime rates going up in Bangalore was IT-people not realizing the value of money and carelessly handling their money and valuable possessions and the cops couldn't really help much unless the IT-guys became more alert).

The TOI correspondent writes :

July 12 : At 9pm, a 17-yearold student had returned a DVD to a store on Church Street and walked to Museum Road to catch an auto. He was accosted by two young men who accused him of being a part of a rowdy gang. He handed over his phone to them to 'make a call' to verify their claims. They disappeared with his phone.

What is a common man to do in order to defend himself under these circumstances?

And, here is the take on this issue by the Who's Who of Bangalore:

Nisha Millet, former swim champion
Ten years ago, Bangalore was not like this. The police must shift focus from shutting down nightclubs and concentrate on law and order. When I'd go for swimming practice at 5am, I'd never see a single cop around. Even in a car, you don't feel safe. I've learnt to be street-smart and now, even when I take an auto during the day, I keep my cell phone in my hand. Bangalore is losing confidence in its police. Plus, the ratio of cops to people is low.

Rohit Barker, RJ
If we can't take a walk down the street, then we're jailed in our own city. Bangalore is exploding and like any other metro, there will be crime. When you look for help, is there ever a cop? The onus is on the police to keep citizens safe. When I return late after my radio show, I don't see any signs of police presence. They keep harping that they're understaffed. Where is the tax money going? Bangaloreans need to say they can't take excuses anymore.

Jaya Javeri, artist
What's happening is scaring me. I'm concerned even if I'm out for a late-night movie. I think twice about going out on my own.

Rubi Chakravarti, actor There's a fear psychosis in the city now. Today I'm afraid to walk out, even at 8pm, to catch an auto. Is a Hoysala full of policemen required to shut down a pub or nightclub at 11.30 pm? Fine, do it then, as long as there's also a whole Hoysala full of policemen preventing people down the road being mugged.

The cops are busy collecting fine (most of the times without any receipt of acknowledgement) from people who haven't parked their vehicle at the proper place or may be have jumped the red-light by a fraction of a second. They are more keen on raiding the pubs, bars and discs in order to make sure anything that remains open till late night is fined.

Can't they first try to solve the problems which are harming common people and which may not smell of money but are far more serious and grave than either Parking issues or serving-of-alcohol-at-night issues?

Labels: Bangalore, Fun, serious, South India